My first night in a club, I was promised by my older cousin, would be a night I would never forget.Twenty minutes through the door and ten Aftershocks later and it already felt like a night I would never remember – and then came Jemima.She gave me the once over, looked into my eyes and said: “I like ‘em tall” and that was that.I woke up three hours later, delirious and deflowered, surrounded by bin bags in an alleyway somewhere on the outskirts of Bristol. She taught me a few things that night (a few more than I care to divulge here), but what I remember most was the sheer maniacal look on Jemima’s face when she realised how tall I was – it was a look I would soon become accustomed to and learn to use to my advantage.There’s a reason I clearly state I'm 6’5” on my Tinder profile, let’s put it that way. Why does being tall work so well when it comes to meeting women?
The loved-up duo appeared on the red carpet at the Mad Max: Fury Road premiere in Cannes and – as well as looking incredible in yellow (a colour that’s nororious to pull off) but her real-life leading man is shorter than her! Standing at 5ft 11in myself, I often find it hard to find tall men that are interesting, attractive and don’t ask me ‘how’s the weather up there? My mum always told me never to wear heels but, hey, if it’s okay for Charlize, then it’s okay for the rest of us, right?
Here are my 7 things only girls know when dating shorter guys: 1.
Jemima was one of those predatory women with a keen eye for the unsettled stagger of youth.
She was also no stranger to an arm wrestle and a family size pork pie.
We can only take coupley photos sitting down – otherwise, it’s going to look really odd and we’ll probably look like we’re babysitting them. Holding hands in public can make things a bit awkward – you end up feeling a bit insecure and worry people are judging you. You’re often really jealous of TV shows and films where girls can cry or snuggle into their boyfriends’ chest – this just doesn’t happen. To the Sophie Dahls and Jamie Cullums of this world – I salute you.