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We need this to be a normal dialogue in the church. Or even; what if you’ve already done a bunch of sexual things or been wrapped up in porn or other activities. I don’t think that your past necessarily disqualifies you from a present or future calling. I’ve written before that regardless of your past you are not disqualified from marriage.

Are you then disqualified from pursuing a life of celibacy for the Kingdom? **** This could happen all sorts of different ways. In fact I went further and fully believe that it doesn’t even disqualify you from who you marry. While both are a one time vow, both require deciding over and over honoring that vow. I’d especially love to hear from those readers who are called to celibacy. ** I’m not suggesting that my pastor friend or his elders were wrong.

One day a few years ago I was meeting with a pastor, who was perhaps in his late twenties, to discuss a singleness talk that I was going to be doing at his church.

We talked about many of the things that we discuss here on this site.


However I think it is worth some discussion and thought. Let’s remember that celibacy is not just living a pure life until you get married. Ideally it’s a vow just like a wedding vow, but to God and not another person.Before we dive in all the way, let’s first say this. We need to share that there are indeed two paths to pursue. I’m going to come back to this soon and talk about why that is and give some thoughts on how to set that up from a practical stand point. I’ve talked about the different ways we get there here.We need to raise our kids in the church knowing that celibate ministry is an option. Not only do we need to talk about it with the 30 year old guy but really with the 13 year old guy. But the question is, what if you’ve already had sex.You could become a Christian after you have already lived a life in which you had sex. In other words, just because you’ve had sex doesn’t mean you have to marry someone who has also had sex and so on. Marriage at that point may well have been the right answer for him.

As he met with some elder men they agreed with his original calling to celibacy but warned him that it would be much harder because of all the sexual experience he had already had.In the end they advised that he go ahead and marry and he agreed and did so.** There is a lot of important questions that this raises.


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